I Have Always Known that I Wanted to be a Mother


I have always known that I wanted to be a mother. I remember as a little girl, I would play with my dolls pretending to be their mother and the role seemed so fitting. My vision of what my journey would look like came to a screeching halt when I started facing unforeseen complications in my pregnancy.  I was quickly awakened from my birth fantasy when my OB told me that I would need to be on bed rest for the third trimester to ensure that the baby will be born full term. Needless to say, my birth plan did not go as expected. After 48 hours of hard labor, I finally gave birth to my little girl Ana. The birth of my baby is still so traumatizing to me and I feel that I am relieving it every day. There are so many aspects of my birth experience that I cannot seem to piece together. Hopeless and out of control is how I feel every day. I fear that these overwhelming emotions will not end. What I thought my first weeks with my baby would be, is not what I expected. I cannot seem to stop feeling depressed no matter what I do and I find myself crying all the time. It seems like I will feel this way forever. I feel anxious and frustrated and I am not eating or sleeping. One of the most challenging experiences has been nursing my daughter.  I just cannot seem to have any success with it and my milk supply is low which makes me worry so much about her weight and so many other things I just do not feel like I have control over. I worry all of the time and it makes my head spin out of control. I do not trust myself anymore and I just want to run away. I feel lost and I do not know what to do. I thought this would be the best time in my life.
Is this your experience?

If so, you are experiencing symptoms of postpartum depression or anxiety.
According to the Journal of American Medical Association in Psychiatry, 1 in 7 women have depression in the year after they give birth.
You do not have to suffer alone. These feelings will NOT last forever. Let me journey with you through this EMBRACE to guide you to the other side, where you will enjoy the wonders of motherhood and regain a sense of your whole self.

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